An SMS from your Cell Phone

You and I have become close friends

Perhaps I know more about you than your mom?

Sometimes you say the sweetest things to your friends

I wish someone talked to me like that

But sometimes you say the worst things to others

I wish I could alter what you say

From waking you up in the morning

To singing lullaby at night, you need me

Yet, I envy you, how lucky you are to be a human!

Truly amazing things, you are capable of doing

I’m flattered by your love for me; But

Keep me aside

Raise your head and look at this beautiful world

Enjoy Life

By the way, I need some rest too.

What to do when you are bored in Office – A Guide

• Open a Notepad/Word and repeatedly type your name. Try doing it faster each time.
• Send an SMS to all the contacts in your mobile. There is bound to be atleast 2-3 people like you who are bored.
• Lock your credit card in your cup board. Now, visit all the online shopping websites one by one. Don’t ever open your cup board at any cost.
• Deliberately lock your login account by repeatedly giving wrong passwords. Now call the helpdesk. You won’t be bored atleast for some time.
• If you are still bored, repeat the above instruction but now in your neighbor’s system who has gone for a coffee break.

Dreams

When I was 8, I had a dream

To play all the video games in the world

But you said it will spoil me

When I was 12, I had a dream

To become Sachin Tendulkar

But you said marks are more important than runs

When I was 16, I had a dream

To love a girl with all my heart

But you said I’m too young

When I was 20, I had a dream

To become a writer

But you said get a job in a corporate

Now, at 23, My dear society you say

‘you’re mature now! Do as you wish, Chase your dreams!’

But I don’t get any dreams anymore

Thank you MEPCO!

It’s Friday, but I feel insecure in my Jeans

And I’m afraid the security might lay his hands on my appraisal

Thank you MEPCO for teaching me discipline!

They keep asking me to innovate and think out of the box

Do you know which book I have to memorize?

Thank you MEPCO! ; If you didn’t teach, it must be unnecessary!

I eat road side Junk food everyday

But unlike my friends, I never develop any complications

Thank you MEPCO for making my body accustomed beforehand!

I follow everyone’s orders with implicit obedience

Never do I question them even if they are wrong

Thank you MEPCO for making me a good follower!

P.S -MEPCO is the Engineering college where i studied :)

What to do when your Manager blasts you – A Guide

Step 1.               Replace your manager with your wife/girl friend in your mind. Now you cannot deny what he says and can’t even think about talking back.

Step 2.               Assume someone just informed you this- ‘India lost the World Cup final against Pakistan and MoM Afridi scored a 100 off 35 balls’. Now you have that terrible look on your face.

Step 3.               Stop listening to what he says but keenly count how much times his lips meet each other. Start again from 0 after you reach 1000. Now you look very attentive to him.

Step 4.               If suddenly his lips have stopped moving realize that you have been asked a question. Now don’t try to justify yourself, you are never going to succeed at that. Start scolding yourself.. don’t stop even if he interrupts.

Step 5.               If all the above have failed, your manager is a really monster. Here is the Brahmastra; Tell him he is the best and how you wish you could be like him and that you are very lucky to have him as your manager.

Step 6.               If you are a girl, don’t bother to follow my above instructions. Just Cry.